On Tuesday, Apple announced the addition of John Lennon to their iTunes catalogue. Big freakin’ deal. While those yokels at Apple go chasing after insignificant, long dead artists–we here at iPoor have locked down a visceral, current, and pretty much alive, musical prodigy.
We have secured the entire back catalogue of Rob Van Winkle, aka Vanilla Ice, aka V-Ice. Maybe you’ve heard of him–he’s sold 20 million albums. We’ve got everything–from ‘Ice, Ice Baby’ to ‘Ice, Ice Baby Remixed’, to ‘Insane Killas’, to ‘Ice, Ice, Baby Millenium Remix (featuring Limp Bizkit)’.
We’re not sure what we’re gonna do with the songs yet–the iPoor’s dynamic monophonic speaker is only capable of playing ‘Twinkle Twinkle Little Star’. But when we finally figure it out and unleash Van Winkle, you can bet the competition will be caught ‘Ice Cold’.
iPoor - our finger on the pulse of America’s youth
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Hello, I'm Steve Nojobs.
Founder and CEO of 
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